Thank you, thank you. One of the most common questions I get
asked other than how do you stay so down to earth while being so famous? The second most common question I get asked is “Hey Ronny, hey Ronny, what your parents think about this? Hey Ronny what your parents think about
what you do? Are your parents okay with you doing stand-up comedy? Ronny what do your parents think about this? Are your parents okay with you doing stand-up comedy? Ronny what do your parents think about this? Innocuous enough question but the insinuation behind it
is downright racist. You’re only asking me that because I’m Asian. You would never ask these other white comedians that question because you know their parents don’t give a f*ck about them. *crowd laughs* What do your parents think about what you do? It’s so f*cking stupid. I feel like we’re all gearing up
for the greatest war of our generation, right? iPhone vs android. Dude I am so sick of iPhone vs Androids, just use what you want and shut up about it. Who cares what phone you use. As though hating on someone else’s phone is going to make you feel better. I got this friend, he uses android right,
stupid *sshole. He happens to use Android and if you just mention the words iPhone around him, right, just mention the words iPhone, he
just starts losing his sh*t. Like oh my god the iPhone? The iPhone sucks. Look at my android, it’s getting stronger
with the hate. Look at it, it’s like a dark side of the
force just unlocking new abilities. The iPhone sucks rise android rise. *crowd laughs* It’s stupid, just use what you want and shut up about it. Who cares what phone you use. I remember when the iPhone 6 came out.
Remember the iPhone 6 came out, that guy released that YouTube video of the iPhone 6 bending? Remember that? Look at this everyone, look at this the iPhone 6 bends. Look at this if you do this to it, it
bends. What a piece of sh*t this is, if you
do this to it… it bends. Yeah, no kidding dipsh*t. *crowd laughs* Oh who would have thought that if you use all your strength to bend an iPhone 6 at it’s weakest point, it breaks. Who knew? There goes my plan to build a bridge of
iPhone 6’s. Just no structural integrity whatsoever. In fact while we’re at it, look at all this
other sh*t around me that I can bend easily with my bare hands, pencils, and spoons everything’s bending. *crowd laughs* Hey listen you guys have been great, thanks for listening, see you guys later. MC: Give it up for Ronny Chieng.