Men are making choices for us, women About birth control abortion health care everything and we can’t even have a say on it cuz they won’t even hear us Can I have my non-feminists in the left spotlight And my feminists in the right spotlight The feminist movement has changed from its original definition The reason why I hesitated is because I started to think about who is most served by mainstream feminism I don’t personally think that that has changed. I think that white heterosexual Cisgendered women are most served by mainstream feminism When I heard the definition of feminist right I was like a feminist like yeah you know I believe in equality the sexes. Of course I do, but it changed the more that I Researched the movement, the more that I saw how mainstream media portrayed it and to me It’s like there’s a lot of issues that happen to men in Disproportionate amounts that are always overlooked. that you know no one talks about the suicide rate No one talks about the homelessness rate for men, and it sucks because if your whole movement is based around equality of the sexes, right? And to make sure both sexes are equaled and that covers the whole The whole spectrum, right? It’s not just one sex, it’s equality. The title of feminist, inherently excludes men. Interesting. -but the definition doesn’t. Male privilege is real. It’s not lost on me how Many more men are in academia and in higher education. Women are called more often to put their careers on hold In order to have children or for whatever other reasons, that’s just kind of the way I see it manifesting most in my life is just seeing how hard it is to be an intellectual woman in academia My name is faith, and I am NOT a feminist. I am a strong woman and I was raised by strong women but I Cannot get behind a few of the core ideals of what it often means to be a feminist So I do not identify as one My mother is a teacher. She has her masters She has years and years of experience and yet Her place within a school, her place within As far as like authority over students, is not the same as a man And I think that’s an inequality that I’ve just been shown from my mother who Comes home and says you know. I just had the worst day of work because I was uncomfortable the entire time or I had a Strange experience with a male student who just like would not listen to a word I said it wasn’t connecting it wasn’t until I brought in the vice principal who was male or Another teacher who was male that things could be kind of squashed and covered Just growing up I would say that overall our our school systems are more geared towards women There’s more female teachers, and that’s how our children are raised. You know the thing is that you were alluding to Your mom has to deal with those difficulties that a man would not have to deal with And men have to deal with a lot of difficulties that most women wouldn’t have to deal with. We do benefit from certain privileges but so do women I think you considered it a privilege that women there are more women in the teaching profession But you should also consider that Other options weren’t necessarily or historically available to women because they were considered to be more nurturing A lot of women were pushed into that field Still, women are choosing these majors And choosing their region of study whereas men are tending to choose higher paying majors They’re choosing more to go into STEM fields and such like that and Reaping the financial benefits while women are also reaping their own happiness benefits of going into a field that they enjoy If I were born the opposite sex my life would be easier I started to walk over Just thinking inherently the privileges that men in this society have and how they’re able to navigate far easier and and all of that stuff and then I thought what it would be like to be a black man in this society and I don’t know that it would be any easier I am first-generation mexican-american. I have two Mexican parents. If I were to be born a male Mexican it’d be so much easier for just that group. I try to break off from those stereotypes of “Melanie gets a table ready for dinner” excuse me, I have two brothers that can do the exact same thing you know why can’t they do it? Why do I have to do it? My name is Melanie Valdez and I am on the feminist side. I had an incident where I was sexually assaulted and that changed my whole perspective. If I was born any other thing than I am I would have to struggle differently than I have already Struggled and you know compared to some people in You know minorities or some people that are white Some people that are white have struggled more than me. There’s always a positive and a negative that you’re born with and It’s how you utilize that and get over it that I think is important rather than focusing on if I was born this or if I was born that. I think it is kind of what we make of it And I’d almost say that to want to be anything different than what we are Is possibly even defeating the purpose of the feminist movement a big part of feminism is Telling women that they’re worth it already, that they’re already enough. I have a little sister. I have friends who were told by their by their father by their older brother that you are enough And now they’re doing whatever they want Because they were told they could they were given the opportunity from the beginning And they weren’t told well if you were man you could. No no no, they were told you are a woman and you can because of who you are. Not sure that having a community that affirms who you are is enough if the society and the structure and the laws and the policies that govern, tell you otherwise. My parents told me I could do whatever I want to do and so I went to law school And I’m an attorney and I write But I don’t make as much as my my Coworker who does the exact same thing and who I’m probably more qualified than. From the statistics that I read, there was no wage gap bills and earnings gaps – So generally it’s your understanding that there is no wage gap between men and women and that.. – Yes, there’s an earning gap different positions different Different schooling can also be a factor you can have the same degree but from two different schools And they’ll pay someone with from a better school different, how the interviews go, even negotiable You know entry salaries. – Why then are women choosing jobs that pay less. Culture Men and women need to work together to create equality I think one of the reasons that I can take issue with certain types of feminism is it does come across as anti-man sometimes. It comes across as “it’s your fault.” You know if I go to a women’s March And I see signs that say smash the patriarchy and like our P word bites back and stuff like that That’s as much as that speaking against you know an oppressive top culture That’s speaking to all men, and I don’t see that as helpful Well, I think all men benefit from patriarchy I mean you need to acknowledge your privilege first. If people could hear that about themselves and not be defensive, think that we could probably push the needle forward a lot faster. Something that plagues the feminist movement is that there’s this idea that in order to Gain equal footing the other side has to be emasculated or has to be dropped down And it’s not this isn’t pie you know what I mean just cuz I get a slice doesn’t mean you get You get less right? Yeah, advocating for women’s rights doesn’t infringe upon men’s rights You know first and second wave feminism were very clear in the very particular things that they were trying to accomplish you had first wave feminism Which was very clearly you know trying to get the right to vote Second wave feminism right after like World War II and such Helping women progress in the workplace and such And now I see third wave feminism, and it is broken apart It can be a lost movement that goes in so many directions has so many extra qualifiers And I think about I was talking to one of my friends who went to the women’s March with a pro-life feminist group And she said on multiple accounts they were asked to leave because that’s not why the women’s march was happening and that they were against the movement and so you have all these different types of feminism. There doesn’t seem to be a clear center and a clear desire And I hear people call themselves feminists for all different reasons and with some of them I would agree and I would call myself a feminist for those reasons, but because it’s so all over the place I just can’t call myself a feminist If feminists can make a concise push towards one issue, together Would I be willing to join? If I agreed with the point, yes. If I agreed with what the movement was going for, yes. As a woman I’m not sure that I’m concerned whether or not you want to join as a man. – Is that not part of the issue? – but that’s segregating gen.. That’s that’s segregating genders if you’re saying that you don’t care about my opinion as a man No I don’t care about reshaping and forming my feminism in a way that is Digestible for you, as a man. – So what’s the current one message? – The definition of feminism Across the board is the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes. Yes, why are we only talking about the female inequalities? – Why aren’t we talking about the male inequalities? – We do not have the same experience We do not. You are not oppressed in the same ways that I am No and I’m sure you’re not oppressed in the same ways that I am. More of our world leaders should be women Let’s talk about for like this like abortion Those who signed the bill, in the room, with Trump, they were all white men. I did not see a single woman. It doesn’t matter if it’s a white woman. I did not take a single woman in there So those men are making choices for us, women About birth control, abortion, health care, everything And we can’t even have a say on it because they won’t even hear us I don’t view it as we should have more women in office. I view it as we should have the most qualified people in office. If you have an issue with you know the bill being signed by white men I believe that voting for congress people that are women or you know whoever you Review and believe or the most qualified will put those people in power If we are talking about the last election. I believe that the most qualified candidate did not win. People need to really consider what role gender played in that. Just logically the people that they’re representing are both men and women so the people representing us should be men and women and It would really hard for me to ever understand why people wouldn’t think that there should be more women in leadership I love women. I love being a woman. I love strong women. I was raised by strong women I don’t agree with all of the things that are traditionally Included in feminist beliefs like I have a different view on abortion than you guys, so that’s a big deal for me. That’s one of the most important things to me I’m a Christian and that’s just one of my beliefs so that’s kind of for me That’s one of the driving forces why I don’t identify as a feminist To divide into into two teams Gender wise is is not Spartan It’s not often what we do, but it is sometimes and how do we avoid that and how do we avoid that separation How do we make it a collective effort even though I’m a conservative white man, and you know there are different views than me And I don’t want to force you to agree with me I don’t want to change your mind in that way, but I want to see how I can still work with you fully and be on your team and you can be on mine as we disagree agreeably. Thank you everyone for probably the most respectful middle ground I’ve ever seen Hey guys, this is Jason from Jubilee, thank you so much for watching another episode of middle ground We hope you enjoyed it as always please let us know in the comments below What your thoughts are as well as if you’ve got any suggestions for any new episodes? Believe it or not, we do read all of your comments. So thank you as always please click here for more videos click here to subscribe and we’ll see you next time.